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Awesome...

Elevation Easter Experience: Opening Video from Elevation Church on Vimeo.

How to Raise a Pansy....Danny Franks

Being that Ashleigh and I are both drawn to Student Ministry, both love to work with and pour into students, and both desire to have several children (like 40 years from now!!!!!); one of the things that we are both trying to do is learn as much as we can before we're in the position of parents.

I've heard it said approximately a million times now that there simply isn't any book or class out there that can prepare you for parenthood, and while I understand that, I also know that I've always WITHOUT EXCEPTION done better on any test that I've prepared for before I actually walked into the exam room. So with that in mind, here's a great post that I found via @letmebefranks on How NOT to raise children.

Read the full post HERE.

How to Raise a Pansy
by Danny Franks, a dad for 14 years tomorrow (happy birthday Jacob!)

1. Always bail them out. Never let your kids own their own mistakes.  Drive to Wal Mart at midnight to buy supplies for the science project due tomorrow that they conveniently forgot about.  Make excuses to the coach on why they didn’t have their uniform, and somehow it’s probably your fault.  Write notes to the teacher every day questioning every unacceptable grade they every get, and somehow it’s probably the teacher’s fault.  (I subscribe to the Kevin Leman school of responsibility: “Pull the rug and let the little buzzards tumble.”)
2. Maintain low expectations. Repeat one of these phrases frequently: “Boys will be boys,” “That’s a teenager for you,” or “Maybe they’ll grow out of it.”  Don’t have a vision for their life.  Expect them to figure it out for themselves.  Let them dictate their lives and butt out, because you’re just the parent, after all.
3. Make sure the world revolves around them. Let them call the shots on where you eat, where you go on vacation, and push their social commitments to the max.  They need to know that the family will stop when their mood strikes.  Cower and cave to every request they ever make, and respond quickly to every pout and tantrum, giving them what they want.
4. Don’t teach them to honor women. Let them view girls at school as an object to be conquered rather than a heart to guard.  Allow them to watch any movie, any TV show, or listen to any song that degrades women or promotes sex because “You can’t shelter them forever.”  Don’t make them hold a door, clear a table, load a dishwasher, or put their clothes away for their mom. (You say that’s woman’s work, I say that you’re a freakin’ idiot and your wife should punch you in the throat.)  Related to this…
5. Let them walk all over their mom. Allow talking back, questioning, and disrespect.  Settle for “good enough” when it comes to the way they honor their mother.  Let them see you model disrespect and dishonor towards her.  Let them treat her as their personal maid.  (At our house, I tell my boys that they can talk to their mom that way, but they won’t talk to my wife that way.  And then I send them on a scavenger hunt to find a soft place to sit until the pain passes.)
6. Leave spiritual things to chance. Don’t put Jesus into real-world scenarios.  Never pray for them.  Never pray with them.  Trust that they’ll read their Bible when they’re ready.  Don’t challenge them to go deeper in their spiritual walk.  Don’t make them go to church or get involved in a small group.  And above all – never let them see you doing any of the above.
7. Don’t have a vision for their life. React rather than respond.  Don’t watch for what God is doing in them.  Never challenge them to tackle great things.  Be prouder of their high score on the PS3 than you are of their character.
8. Never apologize. You’re the omniscient parent.  You don’t make mistakes.  You should not demonstrate humility, say “I was wrong,” and redirect your misdirected course of action.  Don’t ever ask for forgiveness, and don’t ever acknowledge your sin as sin.
9. Never show affection. If you’re going to raise a pansy, the quickest route is to stop the hugs and kisses early on.  Don’t tell your sons you love them.  Don’t let them see you show emotion.  Don’t kiss ‘em goodnight and trade fist bumps and tell them you’re proud of them.  Don’t encourage them.

Practically Unplugged...Collide Magazine

In our perpetually connected world, there's the possibility (especially for the nerdiest of the population like myself) to be perpetually connected, online, plugged in, sync'd, live, etc. However, as much as I dislike the idea of putting down my iPhone, logging out of my twitter and facebook, shutting down my laptop, turning off my workstation, and closing my browser that is perpetually filled with House or The Office; i do recognize that it's not a bad idea to take a break for a second or two here for there. Even when I don't really like it.

The big reason is that as much as I love that stuff, it often drowns out God's voice in my life. It's hard to concentrate when I'm constantly bombarded from every direction with a hundred different things that vibrate, buzz, chip, or beep.

Check out the blog/article HERE.

I found this article that, unlike many, is actually do able in the world of 8-5pm that many of us find ourselves in every day.

In our Jan/Feb issue, Sam Duregger wrote a great article about his time living unplugged — read it here. Today, Sam shares some practical steps toward unplugging:

Last month’s article, “Unplug,” was a glimpse into how I found time with God away from technology, but let’s be honest … living in a tent may not be a feasible option for you. So. I wanted to begin a conversation on how we can practically unplug from technology while still being a functioning member of society, below are some starter ideas:

• Set boundaries on smartphone use. When you’re at dinner with your significant other or friends — try to be present, forget about updating your foursquare status with pictures of your veal parmesan.
  
• Check mail only twice a day, at set times. Tim Ferris, the guy who wrote The 4-hour Work Week, encourages setting times during the day that you check and respond to emails. This allows you to tackle the messages all at once as opposed to being interrupted all day with various emails that may or may not be important. Set a schedule and abide by it — this creates efficiency and margin in your work day.
• Put the TV out of sight. Skye Jethani once told me his family philosophy on television is to, “have it outside the life-flow of the house.” This is a practical and useful strategy, as it’s no longer a peripheral distraction as you walk from your kitchen through the living room to the bedroom. Personally, my TV is in the basement “entertainment room,” and it’s true — out of sight is out of mind. This can be especially useful when kids come in the picture, as the TV can become a binky for the brain.
• Phone fast. Go outside once in a while without your phone, I know this seems unreasonable, but I believe it is important to find time free from the possibility of distraction, as I have found possibility always means inevitability when it comes to technology.
  
• Intentional time with God. My pastor was telling me about Eugene Peterson, the author and pastor, who every week takes a 3-hour walk with his wife in complete silence! Afterward, they sit and discuss their thoughts and what (if anything) they heard from God. This is an unconfirmed report on Eugene Peterson’s life, but true or not seems to be a great way to be intentional with your life partner and God.
  
• Begin your day social media-free. Don’t check your email, Facebook, Twitter, or other social media outlets until after breakfast. This one is difficult for me, but seems to be the most beneficial, as it gives me time to sit, eat, and read the Bible before jumping in the furious interaction found within the Internets.

The fact of the matter is, finding margin in your life is ultimately up to you and it is rooted in discipline and intentionality.

Are you a leader or just a boss?....George Ambler

Here's an excellent article I found on leadership. I recently ran across this guy, and haven't read much by him yet, but this was definitely worth the read! Check out the blog site itself HERE.

I often find that many people onfuse leadership with positional power. We tend to believe that a person in a position of authority or someone with a title, has their position or title due to their leadership qualities. However, in many cases there is no correlation between someone’s position and their leadership ability. Just having a title does not make you a leader, leaderships is about influence. Title only buys you time to exercise true leadership, and in this time your leadership either increases or diminishes and eventually fails. There is a huge difference between being a boss  and being a leader…! Consider the following…

“The boss drives group members; the leader coaches them.
The boss depends upon authority; the leader on good will.
The boss inspires fear; the leader inspires enthusiasm.
The boss says ‘I’; the leader says ‘we.’
The boss assigns the task, the leader sets the pace.
The boss says, ‘Get there on time’; the leader gets there ahead of time.
The boss fixes the blame for the breakdown; the leader fixes the breakdown.
The boss knows how it is done; the leader shows how.
The boss makes work a drudgery; the leader makes it a game.
The boss says, ‘Go’; the leader says, ‘Let’s go.’“

– Author unknown

People follow the boss because they have to if they want to keep their jobs. People follow leaders because of who they are and were they are going.  Too many leaders today rely on their position to lead. How about you?

"I Was Never Mentored".....Between The Times

The Following is an interesting post that was recently listed HERE. Great food for thought for all those folks doing mentoring ministry.

Mentorship is all the rage. Everyone wants to be “mentored” and not a few people want to be a “mentor.” And mentorship has easily found its way into forms of discipleship among evangelicals. Fundamental to mentorship in Christian discipleship is the notion that a mature believer can pass on wisdom and help to shape the life of another.

None would (or should – I’m sure we’ll find some oddball who would) quarrel with the value of such a relationship between two believers. During discussions with overseas workers I found myself, however, confirming some of my suspicions that one-on-one “mentoring” relationships may not be the best form of discipleship.

The one-on-one discipleship movement is usually cast in the context of “Paul/Timothy” relationships, and no doubt there is something to be learned from whatever we learn of that relationship in the biblical text. But I wonder about the wisdom, not to mention the accuracy, of suggesting that the “Paul/Timothy” model is the model for Christian discipleship. I think not, and let me explain why.

The relationship of Paul and Timothy is largely unknown to us. We have limited information from the text itself, and are left to infer the nature of the relationship, the time they spent together, and the nature of the discipleship that occurred between them.

As well, there simply isn’t a singular pattern in the Scriptures that is monolithic or that is prescribed as the primary means of discipleship. Jesus taught the masses and discipled a group of men. And even when we find in Scripture those indications of more personal attention given by Jesus, it isn’t strictly in a “one-on-one” relationship. We should not, therefore, read too much into the descriptions of these relationships in the text. We should not draw too little, of course, but neither should we draw too much.  

While overseas I listened to our workers talk about the task of discipling, and I learned more about what I had discovered in my work here in the states. That is, that discipleship is best done in the context of the community. The one-on-one model lacks the robust opportunities for the formation of life that is found when a believer is influenced by more than one person.

Put another way, the one-on-one model often highlights the strengths of the discipler, but may also unduly reproduce the weaknesses. I became acutely aware of this some years ago when I saw a person who had met one of my “disciples” (a young man I “mentored” for about two years) and our mutual friend commented, “Oh, I wasn’t with him ten minutes before I knew he was your disciple.” As I listened to him explain why I realized that the young man had not only been positively shaped by me, but had also picked up some quirks and peculiarities from me that I could only hope he would outgrow.

Granted, this sort of thing is inevitable in human relationships, but it leads me to ask if the Paul/Timothy model (or a distortion of it) doesn’t have some weaknesses that would lead us to value more highly the prospects of something like the relationship of Priscilla and Aquilla with Apollos, or the model of a mother and father with their child. And to realize that the longer one person disciples another, we might find the greater the possibility that they will absorb weaknesses from their mentor as well as strengths.

In 1 Corinthians we gain some insight into the problems that occur when disciples identify too much with a certain figure in the church. We don’t need anyone in the church to be “of David” or “of Bruce” or “of Nathan” or “of Danny.” We need them to be “of Christ” and our discipleship models should lead us to that end.

Don’t get me wrong. There have been some individuals who have clearly influenced my life – for the good. One older couple was a key influence on me when I was a young man, just starting university. A pastor helped to breed in me a love for the Scriptures and the discipline of theology. Another older man showed me the patterns of a disciplined life. And my doctoral mentor formed in me the desire to be rigorous and relentless in the pursuit of truth and the ministry of the gospel.

I am and always will be grateful for the influence of these men and women. But note that it was a variety of members of God’s church who formed my life as a disciple of Jesus. And among those examples, some of them influenced me concurrently – the body of Christ was used by the Spirit to shape my life.

The “Paul/Timothy” model may not be a discipleship “paradigm” at all. But even if it is, it is only one description of discipleship. It is not commanded, nor does it even appear to be a primary means of forming a Christian way of life.

Rather, life in the community of faith, the cultivation of a liturgical life, and the enactment of faith as a way of life is the stuff of real discipleship. And the church should be diligent and intentional about shaping the life of the community to allow for relationships that form mature disciples.

Perhaps in a subsequent blog I’ll flesh out what that may look like, but for now I’ll leave us with this little challenge to think more thoroughly about the nature of discipleship than we may have previously. And I’ll note that this is what happened to me the past month while joined together to learn with my friends from overseas. We together, in community – studying together, arguing together, eating together, living together – helped to form one another in Christ.

So thank you to my friends – you have made me a better disciple of our Lord.

The Wade/Bailey Wedding by Design...

ok....so check out some of the design work that we did for our Save the Dates, Invitations, and RSVP cards.

Please excuse the quality of the photos....it's still unclear which sucks worse: the camera's resolution, or my ability to take pictures! :-)

Enjoy...

Song of Songs 3:4

 
 
 

95 days...

Yeah...thats right. Only 95 days until we say "I do", and married life begins. Just as a little forewarning, this blog is probably going to take on a "Wedding-ish" feel for the next few months as we prepare and work through this phase of life.

I'll do my best to be sure that it doesn't become a knock off of "The Knot.com"... :-)

2 big things that God is stretching....err...kicking my fricken tail over right now:

1. I SUCK AS A LEADER. Yep...hate to break it to ya, but I do. Everything that I attempt to do myself is already a guarantee'd failure. I'm learning that now more than ever I have to fully rely on Christ...because once I'm married, I'm not the only one who will suffer if I fail. That my friends is an incredibly sobering reality. At the expense of messing up this super spiritual tone that I've got going here, I have to interject that this doesn't mean that I'm sitting around "waiting on the Lord" to drop everything into my lap....quite the contrary.
2. • Providing Financially isn't easy...but the bible provides a fool proof financial plan.
   • Leading Spiritually isn't easy...but the bible provides a fool proof model.
   • Setting a long term plan isn't easy...but the bible provides fool proof guidelines.
   • • This list could go on...but you get the picture.
     • Here lately I feel like i've been trying to drink from a fire hydrant as I'm attempting to study, prepare, and start our marriage off right as the most Godly husband that I can be.
3. I'M THE MOST INCREDIBLY BLESSED DUDE THATS EVER WALKED THE PLANET!!
4. 1.  Yeah....I knew that one wouldn't be a surprise to ya. But seriously, I get to spend the rest of my life with her: 
      

Check out the wedding website:

andrewandashleigh.com

Awesome Poem...

Touch of the Master's Hand

Myrna Brooks Welch

 

T'was battered and scarred, and the auctioneer:
Thought it scarcely worth his while
To waste much time on the old violin,
But held it up with a smile:
"What am I bidden, good folk," he cried,
"Who'll start the bidding for me?"
"A dollar, a dollar"; then "Two!" "Only two?
Two dollars, and who'll make it three?
Three dollars, once; three dollars, twice;
Going for three - "But no,
From the room, far back, a grayhaired man
Came forward and picked up the bow;
Then, wiping the dust from the violin,
And tightening the loose strings,
He played a melody pure and sweet
As a caroling angel sings.
The music ceased, and the auctioneer,
With a voice that was quiet and low, Said:
"What am I bid for the old violin?"
And he held it up with the bow.
"A thousand dollars, and who'll make it two?
Two thousand! and who'll make it three?
Three thousand, once, three thousand, twice,
And going, and gone," said he.
The people cheered, but some of them cried.
"We do not quite understand,
What changed its worth," Swift came the reply:
"The touch of the master's hand."
And many a man with life out of tune,
And battered and scarred with sin,
Is auctioned cheap to the thoughtless crowd,
Much like the old violin.
A "mess of pottage," a glass of wine;
A game - and he travels on.
He is "going" once, and "going" twice;
He's "going" and almost "gone."
But the Master comes, and the foolish crowd
Never can quite understand
The worth of a soul and the change that's wrought
By the touch of the Master's hand.

What is a Gospel-centered Church?...

Found a great article on Rethinking the term "mission". Read the full post HERE.

A movement has begun among a diverse group of evangelical churches. Simply, one by one, pastors are coming to the realization that they are not preaching the gospel.

Pause.

Christian churches that do not preach the gospel? Wait. Are they teaching anti-Christian doctrine? Satanism? Snake-handling? Neo-shamanism? (I don’t really even know what neo-shamanism is, but it sure sounds cool.)

Often, it’s not that these churches have fallen into some gross heresy. Most likely, it’s just that over time, they’ve let the gospel slip in favor of another way to try to draw people and change people.

A few of the most prevalent things I’ve seen that can crowd out the gospel:

Moralism – using fear, rules, and commands as the basis for discouraging sin and encouraging holy living, which sadly results in increased self-righteousness among rule-keepers and absolute despair in those who are unable to live up.

Pragmatism – when in an effort to reach new people, church leaders spend more time teaching helpful techniques or useful principles than actually pointing people to the only thing that has real power to change both hearts and lives.

Political agendas – out of a desire to get involved in the public square and to influence policy, Christians of every political stripe often begin to equate the spread of the gospel with the growth of a specific political party or platform.

What’s tricky is that usually these –isms start with a noble aspiration: a desire to help people change & grow, a desire to reach out to people far from God, a desire to use influence to change the way things are done.

Unfortunately when something other than God is our primary goal, no matter how good that goal is, we will eventually start taking short cuts to get what we want accomplished.

A gospel-centered church understands that change or transformation of any kind, especially authentic heart-transformation, cannot happen apart from the gospel of grace.

A gospel-centered church roots and keeps the focus of all its activity – teaching, worship, outreach, social activism, and discipleship – honed in on the gospel: the riches of the grace of God available because of the sacrificial death of Jesus for sinners.

Because of this, a gospel-centered church is committed to:

• Reading & teaching the entire Bible in light of the gospel.

• Preaching the gospel to believers, not just unbelievers.

• Leaders applying the gospel to themselves first; church leaders are the first repenters.

• Cultivating a leadership culture marked by ever increasing “gospel astonishment.”

• Being known for an atmosphere of grace; gospel-centered churches are safe places for seekers, skeptics and those outside of the faith.

• Producing people who don’t just know the doctrine of the gospel but who love the person of Jesus Christ.

These are the themes that we are committed to fleshing out together in greater detail at Rethink Mission.

At the end of the day, grace isn’t just something we “get” and the cross is not just some object in time. These things hinge on a person. At the center of it all is a person.

Jesus.

In an age when his name is easily tossed around or relegated to some minor point of doctrine used to win arguments and manipulate people, we long for the day when Jesus is seen for what he is: the hero of the story.

Merry Christmas...

"He came to pay a debt he didn't owe because we owed a debt we couldn't pay."